Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Trolls, they're not just under bridges anymore...

Den of the Beastly Bear

Hi Folks!

Every now and then I get told a story I simply MUST pass on!

A group of us at work were talking about some of the crazier things that have happened to us, and oddball family members.

A fellow named "Jeff" offered up this story.

It's about his older brother "Doug". Doug is developmentally challenged. While older than Jeff, he has the mental development of a ten year old. But physically he is 6'2" and about 250 lbs.

Several years ago, with help from the State the family was able to get Doug a home of his own in Saginaw. At 38 years old, he wanted more independance. 

He had a case worker that made weekly visits, and his mother called him daily to see how he was doing and to see if he was having any problems.

Doug had himself a part time job, and took the bus to and from work. There was a bus stop right near his house. 

Mom's daily calls would go something like this...

"Dougy, did you eat breakfast today?"

"Yeah, Mom..."

"What did you have?"


"Did you do up your dishes and put things away?"

"Aw, Ma..."

"Dougy you know you have to take care of yourself now, you can't leave the dishes in the sink it will attract bugs."

"Maybe the fairies will do them!" 
Doug offered hopefully.

Doug had an active imagination and often spun fanciful tales of an exciting life when his mother called. Sometimes he saw dragons, sometimes aliens,
Dougs inner world was anything but boring...

One day when his mother called, Doug excitedly interupted his mother's questioning and asked her:

"Guess what I did today?"

"What Dougy?"

"I caught a Troll!!!"

"A Troll? Where'd a Troll come from?" She asked humoring another of his fantasies. 

"I don't know, there aren't any bridges around...but
I saw him out my window so I snuck up behind him and grabbed him!!!"

"What'd you do once you had him?" Mom asked.

"I locked him in the closet so he couldn't hurt no body"
Doug told her, pleased as punch. Mom continued with her talk and then hung up.

The next day when Mom called Doug seemed distracted, when Mom asked why Doug told her:

"That Troll sure is mean! He calls me bad names and says mean things to me...and I've been nice to him. I gave him food and everything..."

"He's probably mad you caught him...Trolls don't like being caught you know. Maybe you should just let him go." Mom said. 

It was kind of funny, Doug's fantasies were usually fleeting...everyday it would be something different.

"I can't Ma, he says when he gets loose he's gonna hurt me...cause he's mean!"

On the third day, Doug was noticeably agitated. When Mom asked him what was wrong, he told her.

"I couldn't sleep last night...that Troll kept pounding on the walls and hollering" 

About that time she heard a loud pounding, and Doug yelled.


Then Mom heard a voice in the background, so she asked him.

"Who's there with you Dougy?"

"Nobody, it's that darn Troll...he never shuts up!!!"

Mom got a chill... "Dougy, I'm gonna come right leave that Troll alone until I get there, OK?"

"OK," Dougy said dejectedly, he hated being treated like a kid.

When Mom arrived Doug was sitting on the front steps, head in his hands.

"Dougy, what are you doing out here?!?"

"I told that Troll he was in trouble cause you were coming over...he told me 'You're the one that's in trouble dipshit!' I'm not in trouble am I Mom?"
Doug had started to cry as he told her this.

"Of course not Dougy. But you better show me this Troll...where is he?"

"In the front closet, cause that's the only one that locks." It was an older home with a walk in front closet, that took an old key.

With some trepidation Mom unlocked the door.

There sitting in the corner was a man, more specifically a "little person"!!! In one corner were several cereal bowls, and a couple glasses from where Doug had given him something to eat. The smell that rolled out gave mom a bit of a gag, as he'd had to use the another corner as a bathroom. As he stood up she could see he wasn't much over 3' tall.

"About Fucking Time," the little person said "you need to put that fucking idiot on a leash!!! He thinks I'm a Troll for Fucks sake!!!" He was not amused!

Turns out he had been walking to the bus stop when Doug had snatched him up. The cops had to be called...turns out he'd been reported as "missing" by his family.

The group of us that Jeff was telling were in tears by the time he finished telling us...

When I was able to talk, I asked.
"So, what did they do to your brother? Is he in jail?"

"No, but part of the plea deal was he could no longer live alone...he's back living with my parents!"

It was just too good not to share...

Be Well Folks!!!

Beastly Bear


  1. OMG that is hysterical!! What a nut job. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

    1. To us, yes...our little friend did not think it so! Lol


    1. I know, right? How could I have NOT shared that story!!!

  3. Replies
    1. Thanks for stopping in Stanley!!! Yeah he had us in stitches telling us!

  4. Gee guys, I am sorry but I don't find this story funny at all. :( That poor man must've been scared wondering what the hell was in store for him and the indignity of having to use a closet corner for a bathroom. Not to mention his family being worried sick about where he was. And Doug's mental disability isn't funny either. I don't mean to be 'Patty Party Pooper' but this story made me sad.

    1. I understand JoJo, and you are not a Party Pooper. I think we find humor in Doug's childlike innocence, not at what he actually did with it. That never having seen a little person...his immediate thoughts were "this is a creature of Faerie"!
      Of course we can all imagine that to the man involved, and his family this was no laughing matter at all. No need to apologize for what you think!!! <3