Sunday, March 16, 2014

NOT road rage....

Den of the Beastly Bear

Morning Folks!

Well we got a little bit of a thaw, temps in the forties last couple of days...and people have lost their FUCKING MINDS!!!

I have wanted to pull more people out of their cars and beat their asses more in the last two days than in the last six months!!!!

Most of my driving is expressway driving, where the rules are simple and few: keep right, except to pass!

Not rocket science folks!

I would add one more: if you have "cruise control" use it!

This prevents the idiot "leepfrog" move...
You know this guy.
You're motoring along, cruise control set just slightly above the speed limit (cause hey, you're a rebel).

You gradually overtake a slower moving vehicle, move into the left lane to pass, and once by them move back into your previous lane.

Couple minutes later here comes the asshole...blowing by you because "nobody passes me". Gets in front of you and slows back down to his previous speed.

At which point you gradually overtake him again, pass him again, move back to your previous lane again, never having TOUCHED the accelerator!

And here he comes again!!!!!!

I've had an idiot do this to me all the way to work....some thirty miles!!!!

Is this the only fool on the road?!?!? OH NO!!!!

Then there's this guy...
You're driving along, cruise set. In the center lane of three, passing the slower moving traffic on your right.

Then for no apparent reason, some knuckle dragging, mouth breathing, inbred, backwards ass, douche nozzle decides he wants to drive in the center lane and pulls in front of you!!! WTF???

There is no one in front of them, no reason in this whole wide world for them to do that other than to fuck with me!

Or this guy...
Again, minding my own business...traveling down the center lane. Not a soul in front of me but one lone Ass Hat driving 65 in the left lane, no one in front of him, no one behind him...he is all alone!!!

My cruise set at 74, I'm gaining on him quickly.
When I'm no more than three car lengths from him he suddenly decides he needs the center lane! 

So, no blinker and no warning here he comes!!!

When you blow your horn and juke into the left lane to keep from rear ending this window licker, he flips you off cause you're the asshole!!!! 

All these guys are closely related to the butt muncher that flies around you on a multiplane road, cuts in front of you and slams on the brakes to make a right hand turn into a store/driveway.

People might say I have road, I do NOT have road rage, I have idiot rage!!!

I understand that shit happens! I myself have done stupid things on the road..but ya know what?!?


That's all it takes...just say "sorry", and I'm good...
Let's me know you didn't mean it.

Otherwise I gotta assume you just poked the bear on purpose!

In which case you shouldn't be surprised when you pull back a bloody stump!!!

Deep breath....Ohhhhhhhhmmmm Ohhhhhhhhhhhm...

Better now.

Be Well Folks!

Beastly Bear


  1. When I lived out west and commuted I got into road rage with every commute, both morning and evening. I couldn't make it w/o flipping at least one person off, every day. Here in New England no one can drive and forget the use of turn signals. Or you are driving along and someone waits and waits, then pulls out in front of you so you have to slam on your brakes as they go 30 mph, meanwhile there's not a soul behind you and they could have just waited till you pass. Ugh. But Russell gets the worst of it as a trucker. People are riding in his blind spot, cutting him off, shimmying into the safety space he leaves in front of him. Like he can stop 73' of tractor trailer on a dime. Oh hell you know how it is, you are a trucker too! As he says, 'you can't fix stupid'.

    1. Yeah JoJo, driving a truck real does take a special kind of patience...

  2. Omg.. The idiot I can't stand? The one who has to fly past you only to end up at a fucking red light RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU! I'm always like, seriously? You had to drive like an asshole to arrive one car length in front of me??? Dumb ass.

    1. If they are driving 10 or more miles below the speed limit, that idiot is me! Lol
      All I ask is drive the speed limit, or stay the F out of the two left lanes!!!