Saturday, January 25, 2014

Fast food and slow minds 2...

Den of the Beastly Bear

Good evening folks, welcome to "bonus blog"!

Today I had a rare, but pleasurable lunch with my old pal and running buddy Dave "Dynamo" Gawry!

I use the term "lunch" loosely as we took up space at Outback for about 4 hours!!!

I've known Dave going on 30 years now, we worked together at Perry Drugs and made many a run out to Chicago for work. I left Perry's 18 years ago and we've maintained our friendship over the years. Bound together by extreme good taste in books, movies and music...time spent in his company is always a pleasure!!! :-)
GREAT to spend some time with him, to chew the fat and compare notes on the vagaries of life! 

While chatting he reminded me of an incident he bore witness that windiest of cities, Chicago!

It was late for dinner, around 8-8:30 at night. We'd just swapped our empty trailers for full ones and were cold and starving that blustery winter night! There was a Browns Chicken near the truck yard and we pulled in to get something to eat and warm up before heading to our hotel for the night.

While Dave placed his order I looked over the menu.
The large overhead menu extolled the virtues of their numerous meals of chicken, ribs, and pulled pork. The menu also consisted a large assortment of à la carte items like sides, cornbread, and individual pieces of chicken.

Dave had placed his order, paid and was awaiting his problem. I had nothing to fear...right?

The attractive black girl behind the counter gave me a million watt smile as I stepped up to order...this should have been my first clue, no one is that happy at work at 8 o'clock at night!
"Welcome to Brown's, what can I get for you?"
"I'd like 2 chicken breasts and a large Dr. Pepper"
"I'm sorry sir, we don't sell individual pieces of chicken." She said.
"Right there on your à la carte menu, it says chicken breast $1.68...I'd like 2"
"We don't sell our chicken like that..." 
"You know à la carte means 'items available separately' right?" I asked.
"That may be sir, but we don't sell our chicken by the piece!"
"Fine, give me the 2 piece meal, white meat. Substitute a second breast for the wing, and just keep the sides."
"I can't do that either sir, we don't sell just chicken."
"You mean to tell me," I asked, my frustration starting to show "that if I ordered a 12 piece bucket of chicken and didn't want any sides you wouldn't sell me any chicken?!?"
"That's different sir, we offer a 12 piece bucket of just chicken" 
That smile was getting damn annoying!!!
"Fine, give me the 2 piece white meat meal substitute a second breast for the wing and I'll take BBQ baked beans and cornbread, I'll pay the difference."
"I'm sorry sir, I can't do that either...I can't substitute pieces of chicken." 
The smile cranked up a few watts.
"I can however add a second breast for $1.68!"
"That's what à la c...oh never mind, fine...that's fine." 

I'm not certain, but I believe she was fucking with me on purpose!!! I mistook that smile for friendly....not sadistic! Dave believes she just wasn't bright enough to get what I was talking about.

We've laughed about this many times over the years, and today was no different...

Hope you all have an old friend to share a laugh with!

Be well folks!

Beastly Bear


  1. Her smile when she was being do dense would have drove me right up the wall!! At least you finally got to eat! ♥

    1. Believe me Kathy, it took all I had to remain calm...

  2. Aren't those situations scary? I always think, "wow, this is our future, these people are voting.." Have you ever noticed there doesn't seem to be any intelligent people working in fast food, what's the story on that???

    1. So true!!! These are also the ultra PC idiots that life miserable for the rest of us thinking people!!!

  3. I remember when I worked in McDonalds for a sum total of 2 weeks when I was a senior in high school. Wretched job it was. I think that's why only less intelligent people work there b/c the rest of us know better, or use it as a stepping stone.